Why we aren’t celebrating Valentine’s Day

If ever there’s a day designed to make single people feel bad, it’s Valentine’s Day.
 
We say B.S. to that.
 
Let’s name Feb. 14 for what it is: an arbitrary date on the calendar that’s become a consumerist, multi-billion cash grab with an extremely shallow interpretation of love and romance.
 
It’s just a Wednesday like any other.
 
Yet people who are single are made to feel like they are missing out if there is no one special in their life with whom to exchange gifts. The day also sets up unrealistic expectations for those who are coupled that are rarely met. There is lots of pressure on men, especially (talk show host Jay Leno jokingly refers to it as “Extortion Day”) to “prove” their devotion with flowers, fancy dinners, chocolate, and jewelry.
 
North Americans spend more than $30 billion on Valentine’s Day gifts and meals and the average Canadian spends about $100.
 
Is this really the best way to show our love?
 
We don’t think so. The best way? Doing kind things for one another, showing appreciation, spending quality time together, and engaging in physical affection.
 
I always had some chocolates on the breakfast table on Valentine’s Day morning when my kids were growing up. And I’d make a heart-shaped cake with pink icing, just the way my mom did when I was a kid. These were nice little traditions, and the memories are ones I treasure.
 
However, when it came to my then marriage, I was often disappointed on this day (I take some responsibility for this since I often insisted on not making a fuss even though I secretly hoped a fuss would be made).  To be fair, there were years when my ex would write me a poem or buy me an $8 Valentine’s card. I rarely did anything for him, which, looking back, seems unfair and sexist, although he didn’t seem to mind. (It’s usually women who get most worked up about Valentine’s Day.)
 
It’s different now with Amit. I don’t need proof of love one day a year. I’m more cynical about Valentine’s today, but I still believe in love.
 
Amit and I aren’t planning anything fancy today – we are fortunate to be traveling as I write this, and our plan is to grab some tacos for dinner and go for a walk. We’re keeping it simple.
 
There’s nothing wrong with celebrating the day in some small way, but remember — you don’t need a romantic partner to demonstrate the love you feel for the special ones in your life, whether it's your children, your parents (or parent figures), your friends or your pets — they are all worthy of your affection and appreciation on this day, and every other. And you are worthy of love for yourself as well.
 
We wish you a happy – and simple – Valentine’s Day. Hug someone. Offer a compliment. Text a friend. Give your pooch some extra attention.
 
And remember, chocolate will be half-price tomorrow. Treat yourself!